Swimming Lessons

Notes from the neighbourhood pool:

Creepy Hot Tub Guy #1: It's an aquafit class, dude. Not a peep show. I'm pretty sure if Dan were there with you, he'd advise you to be a little more discreet and stop staring! (Unless you thought we were the synchronized swim team that was supposed to be practicing at the same time. In which case, thank you for not laughing.)

Oblivious Guy #1: Umm...you know how that shower by the hot tub is a poolside shower? That means, when you pull open the waistband of your swim trunks to rinse off "down there" - we can all see you. Please stop.

Creepy Hot Tub Guy #2: Yeah, those jets are nice for massages, aren't they? I really enjoyed giving my shoulders and back a once-over. But if you are standing up and leaning forward over one of those jets? It makes me concerned that not all the froth in the water is air bubbles, know what I mean? Um, like - ew!

Oblivious Guy #2: Stretching is good, I agree. But if you are going to sit on the edge of the hot tub and stretch your legs out one at a time...could you do not do it in the direction of the heads sitting in the hot tub, right next to you? Bad lines of sight, dude. Kthxbye.

Note to self: If I'm going to rub the chlorine out of my eyes - please, put the car keys down first!

There will be a quiz on Friday. Class dismissed.