Sunday, June 15, 2008

There will be a quiz on Friday....

By now, you've prolly all figured out that my family isn't exactly "normal" - at least, not by the Cleaver white-picket-fence, Better Homes and Gardens standard. And I like it just fine like that: quirky, interesting, challenging, never dull...and full of valuable life lessons. Including, in honour of Father's Day, just a few of the priceless nuggets of wisdom and experience from my Dad, who has taught me....

*how to change a tire

*how to use power tools

*how to knit (with pencils and string)

*how to apply eyeliner

*how make scars and attach fake hair using Speed-sew

*that men can wear tights in public, too. Even pink ones.

*how to stand in the spotlight

*how to operate the spotlight

*how to properly project my voice

*to S-L-O-W D-O-W-N and ee-NUN-see-yate

*to put a red lens on a flashlight to use backstage

*how to be a good passenger on a motorcyle

*it's not the size of the Leatherman that's important; it's how often you use it

*how to pitch a tent

*that Leonard Cohen, The Band, Robert Service, and Shakespeare are really cool

*that duct tape holds the universe together

*the true-to-life versions of Mother Goose:

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the King's horses and all the King's men
Had scrambled eggs for breakfast

and my favourite:

Mary had a little lamb
Her father killed it dead
Now Mary brings her lamb to school
Between two hunks of bread

There's lots of other stuff, like how to write effective letters to the editor, and how the solar system is like fruit...but I have to save something for next year!

(But, ummm....Dad? I'm kinda glad you were wrong about the whole spinach-putting-hair-on-my-chest thing. Nothing personal. But the toes are enough.)

Love you, Daddy-O!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

There is not a dad in the world that exist without the child.
Lottsa love